I am so excited. I get to go get my hair cut today and my best friend is coming over tonight to have dinner with Jessy & I! It is always so much fun hanging out with her! She cracks us both up!!!

I have the next four days off. I feel like I am as close to heaven as possible right now. On Monday, I will get to have another ultrasound of the baby. I pray that Little Bit is growing and that the heartbeat is getting stronger! It is really strange how many fears and anxious thoughts can make a woman worry like I am doing. I am feeling great. I have been eating frequent, small meals and so the nausea was minimal yesterday and today has just begun. I am adding a banana to the first thing I eat every morning and it seems to be helping. I don;t know why, but it works for me. I had to laugh at Sew with her 4 lbs of cheese. I came home from the grocery strore on Thursday with three packages of cheese. What is it with cheese. I am not a big dairy person, but now I am.

On Tuesday, I have an appointment with a local breast specialist. When I got the call from my doctor that the u/s reports from Wednesday indicated that they needed to be reviewed by a breast specialist I about flipped out. I know that so much could be worse. The area has cleared up alot since the addition of antibiotics. The nurse was so kind and helpful. I kept trying to tell her it was nothing, but she said we just need to make sure and also find out if the pregnancy hormones are causing these changes in your breast tissue. Seriously, I am now calm about it. I am glad they are so aggressive with monitoring my health, praise God.

I just seem to have a lot of worries right now. With work and all. I really have peace about leaving the job, I just don't have peace about leaving my paycheck (though when working for the church it is little) and my maternity care. I don't feel like being mistreated anymore and treated well when someone is happy and being stepped on when they are not. My self-esteem can only go up from here. God will provide for what I need, not what I want.

Praise for God shall be ever in my mouth, let my soul glory in the Lord, who will hear the cry of the poor. (I think this is from psalm 34).

Happy Saturday to you all.

Mother's Day is right about the corner, we are celebrating our Moms by having them over for a BBQ! It will be nice. I saw a card when picking out ones for our moms and it was for a woman who was expecting a baby. It said something like "You will be a great Mom, you already have everything a baby needs - lots of hugs, kisses, and love ready to welcome them. Happy Mother's Day (a little early)" I think that when we are in the throes of infertility, awaiting adoption placement, dealing with a failed adoption, or dealing with the loss of a baby or more than one baby, we all need a card like that!!! Not only for moms with a baby in their belly. I was a mom, whose babies were in heaven. You all are Moms, you have mother's hearts and you are already loving and praying your child/ren into existence, so Happy Mother's Day to you all, I pray that God's graces will enfold you warmly and trust that God does hear all of our prayers.