Images

This image immediately caught my attention on my first walk before my retreat began on Friday. What struck me is that there is this dead, old cypress stump and somehow a beautiful new, baby pine is growing right in the heart of it. I was just so amazed that something so different from the cypress was growing right inside of it. The pine tree was thriving. Yet, for the pine tree to have a place to take root and grow, the cypress had to die to itself. Yes, it might have been a combination of factors that quietly removed the vitality of that cypress tree there was the inevitably necessary hallowing out of itself. At some point, all of it's leaves, then begrudingly, it's branches that allowed the beautiful spanish moss to find shelter, then ultimalely it's trunk also wasted away. Yet the root, the base stayed. It did begin to hollow out, but it was only in the hallowing out, that new life was brought into its midst. It was only in this hallowing out, that there was a place for the seed of this pine to take root and grow.
Lately, in having been reduced to only having one tube and completely having to act out in faith that if I am able to get pregnant, will that tube cooperate or will I be the reduced to no tubes? I am not afraid of adoption. In fact, I love the spirit adoption. I do wonder if we would be approved or will a woman want to place her baby with our family? The truth of the matter, as I was dealing with those fears of losing my right tube, possibly unnecessarily worried, I am trying to prepare my heart and soul that God could choose to hallow me out. Phyically and through humility. So you see, this picture was just an affirmation that if God does see fit to hollow me out to make room for new seeds to grow, I pray that I will find myself thrilled, thankful, and lucky to be in just the right position to accept new life inside of me . . .in the heart of me. The pine and cypress are different, yet the cypress is still able to provide a shelter of sorts to embrace the pine. Although the cypress may seem dead to the human eye, maybe the purpose it was created for has never died, yet FULLY ALIVE. In my humble opinion, both the cypress and pine are blessed beyond measure. They fit together, although the world would think that they would be an unlikely match. The secret is this, neither of them is looking for the apporval of the world, just the approval of their Maker. So, can you see where I was struck by this imagine and what it represented to me in having a heart for for growing my family through adoption should this be God's will for our lives.
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YET....................when I shared this impession with J, he just said "Gosh, this could just mean that a baby is growing in their mother's body." Namely, yours truly. He is so determined and never gives up!!!! hahaha, at least I did get a good laugh out of this. He is the one who is led by his heart and I tend to be a thinker. So only time will tell. I do just want to do my Heavenly Father's will so I am up for what ever it is God decides to bring our way.