Thoughts on Marriage

Today I just wanted to share with you all a very simple sentence that DH and I found at the end of our bible study on St. Paul yesterday. It says that "Clearly marriage is a 'great mystery' that surpasses happiness on the natural level and is orientated to the very salvation of the husbands' and wives' souls."
I told the group we were in last night that before I got married, someone told me that my mission as J's wife was to "make J a saint'. He just laughed, what does that say about me??? HA HA HA.
He clearly thought that was funny and one tough mission, I guess he never knew why all that nagging was heading his way over the years . . ha ha hahahaha.
No, seriously, I have been trying to use some of the lessons from a "Surrendered Wife". He is not responding as the book said he would though, I want to keep trying but I sometimes fail. I am very humbled at this point.
Today I am at home with M (it is mardi gras holiday) and one of the neighbor boys is here playing with him. They are such good boys and it helps that they get along so well. M is really just learning what it means to get along with others his age. He has the hardest time getting along with his 15 mo. older brother. Keep in mind this is the same kid they keep telling me is uncontrollable, mean, and abusive to his mom and brother. He also never eats at home and he has done nothing but eat well and balanced meals here. He told us when he first came over this weekend is that he no longer sleeps good at night. Well, lo and behold the first night he went to bed at a decent time and then we kept getting up to check on him and he slept so well, he slept until 9:20 am. We did not have the heart to wake him, bc it seemed like he was finally getting some peaceful rest. He did well all day yesterday, even in church. We had to find the church with the latest am mass so we could go and not miss due to his sleeping so late. But that worked out beautifully bc we went to the parish I grew up in and rec'd all of my sacraments of initation. We had a beautiful homily and I saw some familiar faces. He slept in a little today, too. He is just so calm at our home . . . what is the deal. I don't stay on his case, bc I don't have to, but there is also no competition for attention. His needs are met and we provide suitable entertainment. I feel sometimes that I will be so tired by the time my children are his age, but I say just let me have the first child and we will take it one day at a time.
I am on cd 10. So far cd 1-7 were red, 8-10 green with only one day of shiny. I am pretty pleased so far bc the days of red were better than the last few cycles. I did have some very light brown bleeding for a few hours on day seven. I had it for 2 days the previous cycle. I don't really know what is making the change, but it makes me hopeful that things are progressively getting better! I start the fertile cm supplements today. They are helping, but I just wonder why it takes such a grand maze to find possible ways to bring life into our marriage? I keep thinking that we are here in this place for a reason. God keeps reminding me of this, I just have to have renewed faith and hope and know that if it doesn't not happen this cycle . . . I will go on and keep trying. Prayers continue for all my buddies on the blog world.