Just a few pics. The lizard was on my plant on our porch and the other two are of our growing Baylie. In one of them it looks like I am choking her, but I swear I was not. I am holidng her under her belly.
First of all! Congrats SEW! Your little one is going to have the cutest clothes and the best parents! Still thanking God for bringing new life into your family!
Prayers continue for you, your DH, and your baby!
**
I have been around reading the blogs but not able to have enough energy to comment. For most of the week, I was recovering from hurting my left arm/elbow this weekend and I am left handed so this was driving me nuts. I had a hard time typing too. This week has been flying by and I am just numb to the comments that are said to me these days.
Here goes:
(1) "You and J should just adopt a baby . . .then you will get pregnant I am sure. You will get pregnant three times! I am so sure of it." This actually came from a dear nun who is dying and has been praying for us. The problem is I did not even share our terrible ordeal bc of hearing she is now on hospice. The comment was said in a loving way, but it just hurt.
(2) "You are losing weight . . .your belly is getting flat!" Once again, this was meant as a compliment, but it just reminded me that I never got to watch my belly grow because of a growing baby."
(3) "Sorry about your loss, but at least you know you CAN get pregnant." As usual, that was meant to be encouraging. Just fell slightly short of encouraging.
Overall, I am tired of grieving. I am tired of not getting my way. I am tired of having to carry this heavy cross. Yet, I believe that good things are coming our way! I am having a hard time praying. I am having a hard time finding comfort in knowing that God can do all things but still let my heart suffer. I know that this too will pass, so I will keep my chin up and wait for the sun to shine on my face once again.
On tuesday, 7/21, I will have my phone consultation with Dr. Hilgers and I am struggling to come up with intelligent questions. I am trying to not focus on blaming, but focus on a new plan of action. Thank you for all of the prayers you all are saying on our behalf. My heart thanks you and I am so grateful. I am lifting you all up in prayers. It is easier to pray for you all, rather than for myself.
I promise to pray for you.
ReplyDeleteI am just so sorry things had to go this way for you. It does NOT make any sense at all.
Although I know that the majority of the time comments like that are from well-intentioned people and not meant to hurt, they still make me so mad sometimes! I'm sorry you have to endure them right now.
ReplyDeleteI know just what you mean about it being easier to pray for others than yourself. I'm this way too, especially lately.
BIG HUGS to you.
Baylie is getting big! Don't worry about trying to think up intelligent questions for you phone consultation. Just give your history, and as you two talk, the proper questions will come. He might even answer them before you have a chance to think of them.
ReplyDeleteI wish people understood infertility better and then they wouldn't (or at least would be less likely to) make those kinds of stupid comments.
ReplyDeleteI definitely have a hard time praying for myself. You're in my prayers. I hope your phone consult goes well. I hope to talk to you soon.
Paul and I have definitely been keeping you in our prayers. We've been praying the 40 day novena to St. Anne along with GIMH each night (well, we missed the night our nephew was born). Anyway, you and J are in our petitions and you will remain there.
ReplyDeleteThe longer I deal with IF, the more I'm annoyed with other people's comments. Just recently I had someone tell me that we just needed to adopt and I looked them straight in the eyes and calmly said "Please never say that to another IF person ever again." I went on to explain (although not very well) how it's just not true. Of course she looked at me like I just didn't know what I was talking about. Oh well, I tried.
I have no idea why God is allowing you to carry this cross. It just doesn't make sense. I'm praying that you have a good consultation with Dr. H!
Thanks....Your prayers I am humbled by. I don't even know how to say it as much as I mean it. :) So it sounds like a two year old. :)
ReplyDeleteI am so excited about Dr. H. Call. I bet you will be bouncing off the wall! :) I would be super nervous!
I hate the comments.....