Any Ideas?

We recently made a decision to pay off the majority of our debt by tapping into our savings. Our goal in doing this is to pay off as much as we can so that we can live on only my husband's income for a good while allowing me to stay home with the baby for as long as possible.

We have two fairly large credit cards to pay off and I understand that we can make a settlement with them. Particularly one of them since most of the charges have been either medication or medical expenses. Does anyone have experience with this?

We want to be diligent in this so that our burdens will be far lighter in the near future. We will be making these decisions this week and trying to get everything lined up, but I feel a bit frazzled using so much of our savings. Everyone keeps reminding me that we will not miss the money nearly as much as we will miss the family time and peace of mind we will experience in the days ahead. I firmly beleive that, but it is a big step in faith to use that security blanket. A dear friend reminded me that at least we had that available to us.

We live a very modest lifestyle so I am praying that this is all of God's will for our family!

Please share your experiences and ideas, I would love to hear about them!

NEW STAGES

I feel like this past weekend I experienced a huge shift in how I have been feeling. For the most part, I am still doing pretty well, just learning what it feels like to really experience the uncomfortable stages of this miracle pregnancy! I was fortunate for so long to not pack on the weight, which is now just a growing number and I feel like there is so much fluid in my belly surrounding this growing boy that I can't do some of the same things I am accustomed to doing. These are not far fetched things, I am simply talking about bending over to dig a pot out of the cabinet or simply putting on my socks and shoes ;)

I have also been experiencing an extensive amount of indigestion and it doesn't matter what or when I eat! So my doctor gave me a script for nexium! I am so excited about this and am looking foward to not being miserable with indigestion nearly all day! I was starting to sleep with 3 pillows, just to be able to lay down without feeling sick.

Today was a big day! I had the first biophysical profile u/s. I was filled with anxiety! I am feeling like a woman of little faith when I am experiencing so much anxiety. Anyway, I was so thankful that the appointment went well. Joseph is looking good and got a score of 8 out of 8 for the test. We are starting the weekly visits so I pray that they all go as well as the one today.

So, I have an appointment Nov. 4, 11, & 15th! My new goal is to make it well through November.

I am looking foward to the baby shower on November 20th! I have been waiting for November for so long . . . then December will be here before we know it, PRAISE GOD!!!

All of this doesn't seem real until I begin to try to move! I got to see my spiritual director this week and she commented on my 'waddle'! Seriously, my hips began to spread this weekend and I was very concerned that the baby dropped and I thought it was happening way too early!

I was able to go to daily mass today and was so excited that I am able to experience the miracle of life in this amazing way . . . I never knew that it would one day happen, I just never gave up hope that this amazing dream would one day come true!

Prayer Warriors

I have to say that I am so thankful for all of your comforting comments and promises of prayers for Joseph and I from the last post. I was almost shaking when I read the warning. I thought and prayed and finally calmed down, no doubt a gift from all of the prayers offered up for us.

I am on the mend - praise God. I also contribute that to all of your prayers. Since the scare, I have only had to take two tylenol, each about 24 hours apart and now the cough is gone (should I say that?) and I have been able to breath much easier. I have been well (no colds, etc) for so long, that I forgot how miserable they really are for everyone. It took a full week for me to recover, that is not saying much for my immune system. Thankfully, baby Joseph stuck it out with me, as well as my poor husband who is so glad I am not coughing anymore.

I had been asking my husband to take me on a "Date Night" for awhile and since we have been so careful with our money, it kept getting pushed further done the wish list. Not that it takes much, but when you are worried constantly about money, you worry about using it needlessly. That all being said, my husband has taken a few days off of work this week to do go deer hunting but he comes home every night and has been taking care of me. Well, last night he suprised me my coming home early - doing laundry, cleaning the kitchen, etc and then called to tell me at work that when I got home we would go out to dinner. Yah, "Date Night"! I was so happy.

I still had some sniffles then, but nothing was going to stand in my way of taking full advantage of this suprise. We started off just catching up - laying in bed before getting ready and that alone just made me thankful to share my life with this man. Then we got ready and went to my favorite little restaurant with little, small tables and candles ;) Unfortunately, the place was packed, but we had the best time ever and full enjoyed just being together and the food was so yummy! We did a few other things after that, but for some reason back pain is becoming an issue with me at times. It doesn't happen all the time, but last night after working a full day with lots of bending, filing, sitting at a desk all day and then walking alot, I was uncomfortable.

I am about to head to get ready for my godson's 2nd birthday. I planned to make some spider oreo cookies, but I am a slacker. I off to make them now, wish me luck!

By the way, once again thanks for being such amazing prayers warriors for me, I try to return the favor for you all!

stressed, updated

I quickly went from relaxed, but sick to HIGHLY STRESSED!

I am still battling this terrible cold or whatever the heck it is that has tried to make me not rest or feel ok since last friday. So after a full day of work, I felt like I had been run over by a truck. I barely made it home in the rain from the seething pain on the left side of my head, dealing with a cough and unable to breathe clearly through my nose. I made it home and then called my husband I called my husband to pick me up some Contac. This was on my doctor's list of approved meds and I remembered that Dr. H has previously said it was ok during the 2ww.

I thought it was safe. I took one pill and then looked it up on online when my symptoms eased and read that Contac Cold/Flu is NOT APPROVED, especially in the last trimester. I was pacing the house after I read this and some not so christian words were escaping my mouth in fear.

I do believe that one pill will not cause the adverse side effect I read about at we.bm.d. My husband is now stressed and feels horrible.

God, I know you are in control of everything, please don't let my silly choices mess up your plans.

_________
Update:

I tried to relax. I did only take one of the pills (1/2 of the dosage) and it only has 2 mg of the antihistimine (the big no-no in the 3rd trimester - who knew?) in the whole pill. The majority of the medication in that pill was a fever reducer ingredient like tylenol. I am trusting that God would rather me relax than stress over things I can't control at this point. At least I have the day off to rest and get better, hopefully! Thanks for your prayers, did not mean to sound off a flare :)

Joseph is growing!

I knew he was growing alot because it seemed I was growing at a rapid pace all of the sudden.

I have gained about 5 lbs in the last two weeks and have suddenly starting showing, praise God. I have been able to stay at my prepregnancy weight for the first 28 weeks for which I was very grateful because I was already overweight. I stopped the t3 about 3 weeks ago and I think this has changed quite a bit for me, including my growing belly and increasing weight which is normal at this time. We have about 8 weeks to go, I can't hardly beleive it.

I saw the perinatalogist today and Joseph is growing well and a busy boy, thank goodness. He is weighing about 4lbs 6oz - amazing!!! I am so very grateful. I looked like a mess at the appointment because I am still miserable from this cold/sinus infection crud. The doctor told me some specific things to take for it and I have one dose in me and plan to go take a nap soon. My poor husband could not sleep last night, because all I could do was toss and turn. The night was not restful again so I took the day off to not expose anyone else to this dreadful cold.

It most likely has nothing to do with the flu shot, I probably already had a cold brewing inside my poor body but hopefully this will be the end of any illness until after Joseph is born (and for a long time after that - it would be tough to nurse him like this).

One last thought, there were not u/s pictures given to me, but he looked so beautiful! I got to see his long spine, growing head, itty bitty thighs :) Amazing!! His heart beating always brings me to adoration of God's handiwork! His heartbeat was 149 bpm and the most glorious sound in all the world. He is also head up (breech) which is the first time he has been seen in that positon. No wonder all the movements feel so different. His head is in my the top right of my belly which is where I thought it was lately, you can feel it so clearly!

Grow, baby, grow!! We love you so!

Sick

I am sick.

Last night all of the sudden around 9 pm, I started to get a slight temp, sore throat, and sinus headache & pressure (head cold symptoms). I think the nurses and doctors lied to me when they said there were no side effects to that darn flu shot. I mean, how can that just come up all of the sudden. So far, I took a tylenol last night and one this morning but the slight temp returns and I don't want to take too much. It was not a good nights rest, but I did get a few hours that felt somewhat restful.

I had made plans to go with a friend to a tea her church was hosting (St. Joseph Church - I felt a kinship just being there :)) entitled "The Power of Prayer & Chocolate" and I ventured out thinking that this little cold will run its course and was just some side effect of the vaccince shot. Yet, at the end, I felt like I was breaking a fever and immediatley came home. I stopped at McDonalds and got me supper because I just knew I could not cook. How sad is that? I now am planning to head to bed after this and have a cold rag on my head. My husband is out of town, so at least I can wallow in self-pity. The sore throat is barely there anymore, thank goodness, but I am wary of taking too much tylenol. I am trying to space it out and am only taking one at a time. What is awful is that this feels like a summer cold because it is still warm outside and not feeling like fall today.

I have so many thoughtful and inspiring thoughts from my day, but can barely think clearly.

I found out that getting side effects like the ones I have from the shot are somewhat common, so it should clear up quickly, but it makes you wonder if you feel miserable how is it affecting your precious baby?

Hope you all are feeling great and enjoying your weekend!!!

Why Joseph has a holey mommy!

J and I have been joking lately that I am full of holes!!

Think about it, I have been getting PIO injections 2xweek for the last 28 weeks in my backside!

I have been poking myself 4xday for glucose monitoring for the last 6 weeks!

Lots of blood draws - too many to count! Progesterone draws every two weeks, regular draws for pregnancy, and all the GTT for GD!

And today, got a gloriously less painful flu shot in the arm. I think the nurse was suprised I did not wince in pain.

So lets add that up -

56 pio shots
168 finger pricks
1 flu shot
20 (minimum) draws for blood - progesterone and regular prenatal ones

Grand Total:
One HOLEY momma!!!
One Healthy baby boy!!!
One happy daddy!!!
= One very happy family!!!

In all honestly, I love being Joseph's mommy, holes and all!

Random updates w/ update :)

There is probably not a lot of good thought flow, but I just wanted to jot down some thoughts from the last few days.

Every single day is better than the last, praise God.

I am so excited to say that I have been feeling well and very peaceful about things. It is such a joy when people ask me how I am feeling and I can honestly tell them "That I feel great!" The only thing that was a bit questionable was sleeping, but I think that comes with the territory.

I got some news on Friday that my progesterone from Tuesday's draw was 71.1 and that all I really need to do now is the PIO shots 2xwk. I was on both the oral meds and the v.s. of progesterone. I really am a bit nervous about d/c the oral and v.s. ones and am wanting to self-medicate since it is right there. I don't want to overmedicate Joseph with progesterone, though. At the end of September, I was able to stop taking the T3, I was nervous about that, too, but all is working out.

Today was great. I stayed home almost all day, only ventured out to get a BLIZZARD! Why are they so addicting? I had one last Saturday and one this Saturday. The funniest thing is that my blood sugar levels are just what they want. I make decent choices (not including the blizzard, but once a week should not cause harm??) and it is managable so far. I love that I learned how to make it work. I also have a huge, growing motivator!

We did some things in the nursery today and the only things in there are for the baby. Imagine that!!! It is finally cleared of things not related to needs for the baby.

We are working on trying to get Baylie used to baby smells and noises. She has been my baby for the last year. I understand that I need to get a recording of a crying baby and play it a bit day by day and slowly raise the volume to get her used to it. Daisy has been around babies and is more relaxed and will go to her happy place (under our bed) when she needs her own space, so we are not so worried about her. Baylie is always friendly with toddlers, but we are not sure about how she will respond to Joseph in the first few weeks. I also got a baby doll (one from the toybox) and swaddled it after putting some baby powder on the blanket to see how she would respond. The doll plays a lullaby, but she was a bit beside herself at first, we shall see.

Today I took two small naps! TWO! Will I sleep tonight, I hope so! It could easily be about two months until Joseph's arrival, I can barely believe it! It is starting to seem more real every day. I find myself so hopeful these days.

Speaking of hope, I made an appointment to meet with the pediatrician we are choosing for baby Joseph. It will be next week. I am a bit nervous because I want to make sure I make the most of the visit and ask all the questions I want. This meeting is strictly to set my mind at ease that we are choosing the right doctor for him. I could really use some help coming up with a list of questions, please feel free to share some of your wisdom with me ;)

I have a baby shower to go to tomorrow and it will be the first shower I will be able to go to pregnant and I still feel a bit weird about it. I just have to keep trusting God!

______________________

I don't know what I was thinking! I did get to go to one of the best showers for my dear friend Stacey when I was pregnant in August. It was just different - not weird at all! You see, we both had similar jouneys and tears of joy were evident as I watched her being showered in love for her new baby!! Not to mention the glowing father :) It was a dreamy shower!

LIFE

Today has been a fabulous day already.

I had the day off and was able to go an appointment that I needed to go to down in Cameron Parish. Most of you are not familiar with Louisiana too much, but Cameron Parish was the area Louisiana that was most severely damaged by Hurricane Rita. Hurricane Rita changed so many lives and the face of Louisiana was changed dramatically.

It has just barely been over five years ago that we had to flee for safety and came home two weeks later to find our home severely damaged and not repairable by the time insurance finally settled with us. We were one of the lucky and blessed families. I can't believe I am even saying that because at the time, our woundness of losing our first home was overwhelming and it seemed our dreams were just put on hold as we struggled to look past the tragedy and dream of a future full of hope.

Going back to the point of mentioning Cameron Parish is that for some reason my appointment was moved there (nearly 1 hour away from my home) and I was a little resentful of the inconvience of this but even last night I told my husband that this might be God's way of revealing something to me, a new way to get my attention! So I woke up bright and early and made the trek down south.

I remember in the months following the Hurricane, there was so much destruction that it was so heartbreaking to even drive down the highways that were cleared of debris. The area was not a hugely populated one, but it was home to many amazing families and their lives were in shambles. We passed on the roadways and would see whole houses stranded in the marshes. Horse trailers that were blown/pushed by the raging waves more than twenty miles from their original locations to the side marshes near the roadways. The signs of sorrow and brokeness evident with each passing glance. I remember one of the families I served at the time completely lost nearly everything that they did not take with them when they departed to run from the storm. When they were able to return to "Look & Leave" there home was completely gone, only a few of the cinder blocks remained standing. Through the brokeness around them they found a few plates that were unbroken in the mud. These were very bleak moments.

Yet, today when I drove down these same highways I saw so many signs of recovery - NEW LIFE! There were new homes built everywhere, lots of rockers on porches signifying a return to normalcy to this fishing community. We are talking about the area closest to the Gulf of Mexico and these faithful people came back and rebuilt their lives. Knowing that they may experience grief and hardship again, they embraced their dreams of living on the land they owned, most likely passed on from generations past. They did not look at the cost as being too great to outweigh the hard work necessary to start over. Yes, five years later the look of Cameron Parish is different, but the heart is still pumping the same blood through that community.

The same goes for my husband and I.

I realize that our journey through infertility and loss could have easily destroyed us. There were times when the surgerys, the medications, the sorrow, the shots, the loneliness nearly toppled us over like the waves of Hurricane Rita did to those homes. Yet, God had redeeemed us to allow see us to a brighter day - a day of new life. A journey of hope. Years ago, if you would drive on the road of our lives, you would see sorrow much like I saw five years ago when riding through Cameron Parish but now the road looks different. Our faces are the same but the view has changed, praise God. We still experience and know of the cost of the loss of dreams, the loss of children but we are also experiencing the joy of new hope and the wonder of becoming parents to our third child!

We are in a new place, built by the design of God's vision. We get to feel the wave of new life when Joseph moves inside my womb. We get to dream in a new way and love in an even deeper way as we realize that he is a gift that has been long-awaited and that jouney could not have been different if we wanted to reach this destination. It is my greatest pleasure to hear my husband tell me "The nursery is looking better and better every time I walk in there!" It is unbelievable to me to experience the joy of being pregnant, of watching my belly grow and move all because God is growing a baby in there.

See God had a reason to get me spend time with him this morning on my drive to the Louisiana coast. It made me appreciate our home, but even more than that it made me appreciate our dreams and our journey.

Our life has not been without its share of sorrows or struggle, but I will rejoice in the day that God broke through the clouds of our lives, scattered the storms, and brought us the sun to warm our face again and to dry our tears.

I am now sitting at home, smelling the gumbo I am cooking (duck, chicken & sausage gumbo) and feeling Joseph move. By the way I was inspired by PHDW to make gumbo this week since we have been having cooler temperatures. Thanks for the inspiration, this will make my husband very happy!