Body Changes

I have to admit, I was not ready for pain.

At least not yet.

Yesterday, I ran into a craft store near the lab to pick up some drawer pulls for Joseph's dresses when I realized I could barely walk upright. When I got to the store, I had to run all the way to the back of the store for the restroom. Immediately after that, I was walking to the section with the drawer pulls and realized the area that was operated on last year where my left tube was removed was feeling very sore and like really taut muscles that did not want to stretch. I made it to drawer pulls - very slowly and even slower to the checkout and then just sat in my car for awhile trying to relax. I drank a bottle of water and then ran back to the labe to pick up the serum and ship it. I was feeling much better at this time.

Good thing because I was looking foward to visiting a dear friend and her precious daughter for lunch. Well, there was no problem with that side for the duration of the visit. Praise the Lord.

Next, I went to make a visit to my Mom at the hospital in the afternoon after her day of therapy and since I parked nearly a whole block away and then made my way around the hospital, the pain returned once I arrived to her room. I was useless, I collapsed in her new wheelchair because she wanted me to check out its comfort. I finally managed to help her with some things while there but she could tell of my discomfort because I kept touching my left side.

The pain subsided. I made my way home and it continued to come and go. It was really uncomfortable at bedtime, but with extra pillows, I fell asleep. I woke up ok, started moving around and the pain returned. GREAT!!! I could barely get dressed for work. I kept thinking it must be worse because of bloating, etc. The GAS.x. was a temp fix, but apparently that is not the issue. I did make it to work - but the pain continued to come and go throughout the day and made me ponder what contrations will feel like? I would be lying if I said that the pain was easy to endure. I tried to not complain.

I made it home - completely wiped out. I worked the full day like that, the pain did ease up at times. My husband was so wonderful. He helped me get a ton of things done around the house and I ended up doing three loads of laudry with his help and he cleaned the kitchen and living room. His mom wanted to use our home to host a party tomorrow evening and at the rate I was going, I could not gurantee that I would be feeling better tomorrow to do it. I have the full day off tomorrow and I plan to STAY HOME ALL DAY!! Even my mom understands I need a day of no driving, but rest.

One of the reasons I did not call the doctor today to alert them of the pain was because I just want to have a day of no appts, driving, poking, or prodding. I also really think the pain is stretching pains. This boy is getting bigger and probably running out of room. He is still moving and grooving and even then the pain can increase on that left side where I imagine the scar tissue, etc to be localized.

Speaking of his movements, they are so much stronger these days that it startles me. I am not used to such strong kicks and punching. Is this common toward the end? I still love all of his movments, they bring me so much comfort knowing he is thriving. I have to work diligently, minute by minute, to trust in God's great plan for Joseph, J, and I. It is terribly difficult to try to cast off fear and offer up willingness to surrender to God's will and not your own. You would think that I have this lesson mastered by now, but God is still giving me plenty of opportunities to learn and to grow.