Our Lady

For so many years, I struggled to develop a close relationship with Mother Mary, however during my struggls with infertility and in dealing with the grief of losing two children during early pregnancy I found my place under her mantle of protection. She became my companion as I learned to be a mom without living children, her "yes" to God's will was a stark reminder that I was never alone in saying "yes" to God and his will even when it was foreign to everything I had anticipated my future to look like.  So now, my live for her has multiplied over the years and I know I can trust my hearts deepest struggles and joys into her care as I bring them to prayer and ask for her intercession.

So imagine my great joy when I received this beautiful icon of my special heavenly mother.  

She spent about 5-6 weeks in our home before we were called to share her with someone else.  Initially I felt a little lost saying the prayer that went along with this image.  It was all about begging God to bring new life to my womb.  I started out with great ambition for this prayer to be answered but my soul was not at peace asking for this intention only.  Instead, each time I consciously passed by her image, I prayed a prayer if thanksgiving.  Thanking God for the miracle of our sweet Joseph and for the blessing of being a mom to the two prescious children that reside in Heaven, I eagerly await to be in their company someday (though I am happy to wait awhile so I can enjoy this life here on earth).  I also found some deep desires to  bring the wonderful group of ladies who are waiting for their miracle, more so than even asking for a sibling for Joseph here on earth.  

Before she resided in our home in this image, I was restless - desperate for a way to bring Joseph a sibling but I have a peace lately that if God desires it for our family he will remove the obstacles to bring that incredible dream to fruition.

I really did hated to see her go.  It was hard on my heart to let her go because I truly believe the beautiful icon reminded me to trust her even with my heart because she is bringing all of prayers to her prescious son.  I feel like there was a converion that happened deep in my heart, one I was not seeking but so grateful for having encountered.

Never underestimate the power of prayer, even when we simply bring our brokenness, we can walk away with a healed heart.  Old wounds can be healed.  Even wounds that had been buried & unknown, God is there with his healing touch.